Its just breakfast

I thot and i thot and i thot..and i thot wrong.

All am asking is if u like to have breakfast with me.

Dats all. A simple yes or no.

Not a lengthy justification saying it is only at my convenience.

U haven't ask for quite awhile so normally i wud do the asking.

Is dat strange for u?

Is dat weird for u?

Just a simple Yes or No :(((

The week past

Eventful week.

Full of ups and downs. If it weren't for others, i could have gone insane.

Wish i could change everything but alas am just a mere mortal.

Denied of magic and superior powers. All i can do for u is pray for ur happiness.

Denial and acceptance is part of ur play. It denies u of ur own happiness, and not others.

Truth be told but fallen on deaf ears, blind eyes and harden soul. Faith remains to justify actions. Who to blame is beyond believe. Time and time again, the soul is tested yet all it did was to harden the very heart that holds memories of past. Hidden and forgotten.

I pity u. I pity the rest of us. I shall remain steadfast. No matter what the outcome. Though promises of length cannot be justified as past may not be in the future. Please stay good and warm but it is fast diminishing through the passing seconds that lay ahead.

I believe u can but can u?

Laughter and fun with others yet problems you would share with me. The only thing you could share with me. Whats going on? Maybe we do need a break from each other.

Too distraught to say anything...

Seems everything is questionable.

Nothing is right...

It has to be agreeable to be taken.

What the hell? Am i not entitled to my own thots?

Monday Blistered

Cant sleep.

Mozzies entered my sleep again.

I've made up my mind to be good today.

Get up well and go to work.

Did good. Got some work done right till the call from Perk.

He's in KL. did his plate number for his brand new vios. Good for him. Anna was hungry. Got the two down to klcc. Ate at chillis. Stuffed ourselves with chips and meat. Goodness. I seriously need to look into my exercise regime again. Was a good lunch and a good walk around uniqlo. Saw the autumn jacket going down to $49.90 from $79.90. Anna was excited but alas no size. Haha

Back to work till 5. Met up with my bestest buddy for tea. Didnt eat since morning as usual. Goodness me. I cant live like that but who am i to say anything. First glance, not a single smile. This is bad. I dont like it. Seriously. No talking during meal. And i was again bring slammed for not talking. Excuse me?? You cant talk to me like that when you cant even say a word to Ayam when he is acting that way. Sometimes i do wonder why he'd seen someone else when you are acting this way towards him. And he said that you changed. I know how it feels. I know your need to feel wanted and needed but heck this is not the way my dear. Its ridiculous. See your face in the mirror sometimes and try to reflect back what you did to people. I know its not you deep down. But its not an excuse to insult me everytime. I do have feelings too. Its really a one sided relationship. I give you take. You expected to be loved for yourself but ignore the needs of others. And it is Me. Someone who would stand in harm's way so you could be spared. Friends ask me why i could stand such abuse. All i can say is it is not the real you. Am I right? I wonder...p

New day new beginning...

Wat i did yesterday?

Groceries with mom. Somethg dat she wants to do

after abah died 8 weeks ago. Other outings she wud decline cept going to

her sister's place. Sigh

Only 3 of us in the house. Feels like staying in Seoul. Fixed tv channel. 391. Aww god help

me. Some of the documentaries are quite good but an overdose of it. Err....

Then pack off old books. Found my late dad's pictures when they went outing some years back. Cant show it to Mom though. She wud get all teary eyed. Keep it away from her for now. Sigh

Saw ajim's photos when he was a tiny little boy of 3-4. Running around kampong picking rambutans. With that silly smirk of his. Time sure flies like larks in the sky. Swiftly. Silently. Wonder what he is doing in Bworth now. Hope he is doing his best to embrace life.

May Allah be with you always coz i cant ;((

sunday affair

Sunday morning...
Got an early morning call. Cant wait for another minute, dawn is leaving me..
Once done, went downstairs and saw everybody are back under the covers.
Cant sleep no more ...
Saw my blog not entered for a zillion years ..
Silly me ..

Cant say i dun have time but more like lazy to the bones ..
Need to perk up my bones and mind ..
Need to do this

So much in my mind i cant let go
i cant say a word as it will be attacked mercilessly
so i shall say it elsewhere
writing letters in bottles is a waste of good bottles and bad to environment
status updates will be taken wrongly and mislead
diary ha-ha-hardy ha-ha
so here i am ...

hope nobody finds me here